Watchmen: Snyder's take

***WARNING-SPOILERS***
This is just a quick comparison of what the producers had in mind for the Watchmen movie and the changes that Zack Snyder has made since he's been on board. All I have to say is if you're not a fan of a certain comic book, don't attempt to make a movie based on that book, please! (Are you listening, Brett Ratner?)

Pre-Snyder:

- Film is set in 2005
- The Comedian and Manhattan are hunting down Osama Bin Laden
- The Minutemen are called The Watchmen and the Crimebusters are called The New Watchmen
- Mothman, Captain Metropolis, Silhouette, and Hooded Justice, the two Bernies, and many other secondary characters were removed.
- Hollis Mason breaks up Sally Jupiter's sexual assault.
- New dialogue was written for all the characters. Each line was a true butchery of the characters. Rorschach even spoke in full sentences!
- No more Comedian funeral flashbacks, Mars flashbacks, or Rorschach theropy session flashbacks. Although they were in the script, the studio would have removed them (Snyder even said that WB were trying to force his hand to remove them).
- Laurie is now called Slingslot and has superpowers given to her by Manhattan.
- Manhattan, or more specifically Jon Osterman, would have been black (seriously).
- No Bernies obviously means no Tales of the Black Freighter.
- Due to the moved timeline there are hundreds of plotholes.
- No Bubastis.
- Instead of the alien there is a fake Manhattan attack with odd voiceovers by a fake Manhattan. The energy attacks come from Karnak (very subtle).
- Veidt dies, thereby killing the themes and point of the story.
- Seymour picks up Rorshach's journal, completely destroying the open ending the book had.
- Film would be shot in a MTV style quick cut, choppy editing.
- Running time would be a little over 2 hours.

Snyder's film:

- Film is set in 1985
- The Minutemen are called The Minutemen and the Crimebusters are unnamed, but due to WB's request the name Watchmen will be used as a slur to describe all superheroes.
- Mothman, Captain Metropolis, Silhouette, and Hooded Justice, the two Bernies, and many other secondary characters were added back in.
- All of the two Bernie's scenes in the book were filmed.
- Tales of the Black Freighter is an animated film that will be edited into the Director's Cut.
- Hooded Justice breaks up Sally Jupiter's sexual assault.
- New dialogue was kept to a minimum. Most of the dialogue was taken right from the book.
- The Comedian funeral flashbacks, Mars flashbacks, and Rorschach theropy session flashbacks are in.
- Laurie is the second Silk Spectre and has no superpowers.
- Osterman is white.
- The timeline is the same as the book's.
- Bubastis is in.
- Instead of the alien there is a fake Manhattan attack with no odd voiceovers by a fake Manhattan. The energy attacks no longer come from Karnak, but appear at their destinations almost like they were teleported there. People who have seen the film say it is an elegant ending and generally keeps the thematical purpose and themes that the alien has in the book.
- Veidt lives.
- Seymour's hand hovers above the journal before the film cuts to black (like the book's).
- A classical slow and steady directing approach is used.
- 2 hour 35 minute theatrical runtime; almost 4 hour Director's Cut runtime.

Happy Valentine's Day

Ah, St. Valentines Day...Much in the spirit of Election Day, today is a day in which all Americans must make a choice. You really only have three to choose from: Be single, spend money, or look like a jerk (that goes for you too, ladies). Well, while your deciding which way to go, why not enjoy the latest Happy Tree Friends episode, "I Heart U" made specifically to capture the romance of this most cherished of days.

Friday the 13th 'Spoilers': Review

Last October I posted a number of spoilers basically describing Jason's kill list in chronological order. Let's see how the list held up, shall we?

[From October ]

• [B+] Don't expect this to be an origin story. They're skipping the appetizers and going right for the main course, focusing mainly on the timeline that would have technically fallen between 13th's 2-4.
  
• [A-] The supernatural aspect of Jason is all but gone. He is still exceptionally strong and he runs a lot more often than we've gotten used to, but if you want to know how he really gets around so fast -Jason has somehow taken the time to dig out huge underground tunnels to allow for quicker access to different areas of the woods.
  
• [C+] Ah, that hockey mask! Making it's debut in part 3, Jason takes the mask from a practical joker who, ironically, used it tend pretend to be a killer to scare the pants off of a girl he was, ironically, trying to get out of her pants. makes his way back from the woods with a hefty cargo of weed, he retires inside for a little 'barn burning' (if you know what I mean). As he puts on this strangely familiar hockey mask, he sees Mr. Voorhees descending from the second floor. Not missing a beat, he exclaims, "You're the one stealing all the kerosene!...Oh no! You can have it!... You don't need that man!...Put it away!" After a quick decapitation, Jason grabs the mask and examines it [END SCENE]. As iconic as a scene this would have been, they don't even bother showing him slip the mask on for the first time, they just move on. The crowd would go nuts! I definitely hope they re-think that decision. Though he does start with that stylish sack-head look from part 2, Jason decides to upgrade when he 'borrows' the mask from a redneck stoner. As Toke-em-up Joe
• The thing that Jason does best (except for Guitar Hero) is rack up a body count. Want to know the who's & how's? Well, we've got them right here:
  

1. [A+] Guy dies by a machete to the neck area after finding a bush of weed.
2. [A+] Girl is put into a sleeping bag and tied above the campfire, suffocating and burning her, though it was probably more the asphyxiation than the fire that killed her. She falls out of the sleeping back and to the right of the fire.
3. [A+] Boyfriend of redhead chick gets pulled into the floor of the Voorhees cabin after being stabbed in the foot and hand from below as he's crawling across the floor.
4. [A+] Boyfriend of the sleeping bag girl, while trying to save her, gets caught in a bear trap. Redhead appears and tries to save him, but Jason runs up from behind and sticks his machete vertically into his head. He runs towards redhead, swings and fade to black...[OPENING TITLE]. ***At this point the main cast is shown arriving a large, expensive cabin.
5. [B-] Stoner redneck death [from mask acquisition]. Takes place in a barn workshop or something. Jason grabs his head, decapitates him, takes the mask off the head and looks at it.
6. [A+] Arrow through the head of the guy driving the speedboat that's pulling a topless blonde chick as she water skis or something.
7. [A+] Water skiing girl gets hit by the speedboat but lives. She goes under the dock and see's Jason walking above. He turns away and we see her kinda relax and then -a machete into her brain. Jason pulls her up for a corny reveal of her fake boobs and pulls the machete out of her head, letting her fall back into the water.
8. [A+] Chewie (Aaron Yoo) gets killed by a rod into the throat in the tool shed.
9. [A+] Token black guy goes out to look for Chewie only to meet Jason. He runs away after hitting Jason a few times only to get an axe thrown into his back. He screams for help but his friends in the cabin don't respond.
10. [A] Blonde chick with the ONLY real set of boobs, gets grabbed from behind by Jason in the bathroom. He holds her mouth closed and pinches her nose, suffocating her. Then sticks her on the coat hanger on the door.
11. [A+] Police officer gets a fire poker through the eye, sticking him to the front door.
12. [A] Guy that did it with blonde chick with real boobs gets macheted from behind through the back and chest as he's checking who is in the truck that almost hit him. Jason throws him onto the back of the truck and he gets hauled off in a crucifix position with his feet dragging on the ground.
13. [A] After finding the redhead, her bro and brown haired chick try to escape through the tunnel below the Voorhees cabin. Brown haired chick gets stabbed multiple times through her back right when she's about to exit the whole in the wall.
14. [A+] Jason "dies" after the redhead and her brother tie a chain around his neck and throw the other end into a wood grinder or chipper. Jason's neck snaps.

• [A+] So, how does end? Well, somehow they drag Jason's body to the lake, push him into the lake without the mask, then the main guy kicks the mask into the lake. Redhead drops the necklace with the picture of Jason's mom into the water. Jason does his Kool-Aid guy impression by busting through the wooden dock and it fades to black as he grabs the redhead.

Overall, I'd say it was pretty accurate; not a lot of changes. I'm sorry if the spoilers ruined the movie for anyone, but that IS why they are called "spoilers".

TMNT: SMASH UP for the Wii

Although I do love a good fighting game, I feel like many times they are too cookie-cutter and repetitive. But unless I hear something horrible about this game before I get a chance to shell out the money for it, this game is going to be spinning in my Wii console on day one. From the makers of the fan favorite Super Smash Bros. Brawl comes Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Smash Up, a 3-D environment fighting game featuring characters who were born to star in a fighting game (they're ninjas for crying out loud!) as well as other characters from the entire turtle universe. This isn't the first TMNT fighting game and it hasn't been that long since the last TMNT game hit consoles, but it has been quite a while since the turtles have been featured in a game that has players glued to their televisions for irrational periods of time (like the original NES game). This game definitely has the potential to log quite a bit more hours from players than some of the recent incarnations of TMNT games. I guess will just have to wait until Fall 2009 to see.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Smash Up 'Debut' trailer

CHAD AFTER THE DENTIST

Here's everyone's favorite Sith sibling, Chad Vader, in a parody of David After the Dentist, a popular online video about a young boy's first experience being...medicated.


In case you've never actually seen David After the Dentist, here it is:

X-Men cartoon comes to DVD

Uh oh, I can hear the synthesized music playing in my head already! Fans of the old 90's X-Men cartoon rejoice, because it looks like the long wait is over. Buena Vista Home Entertainment has officially announced that the X-Men cartoon will be coming to DVD starting with the first two releases on April 28th, 2009. The two volumes will contain a combined 32 episodes for a total run-time 759 minutes (that's over 12 1/2 hours of mutant goodness!), including the 5-part Pheonix Saga! Whether there will be future releases or not is still yet to be seen, but this should definitely scratch that itch...at least for a little while. In case you were wondering, I've included a list of the episodes contained on each disc.

VOLUME 1
[Disc 1]
-Night of the Sentinels (Part 1)
-Night of the Sentinels (Part 2)
-Enter Magneto
-Deadly Reunions
-Captive Hearts
-Cold Vengeance
-Slave Island
-The Unstoppable Juggernaut
[Disc 2]
-The Cure
-Come The Apocalypse
-Days Of Future Past (Part 1)
-Days Of Future Past (Part 2)
-The Final Decision
-Till Death Do Us Part (Part 1)
-Till Death Do Us Part (Part 2)
-Whatever It Takes

VOLUME 2
[Disc 1]
-Red Dawn
-Repo Man
-X-Ternally Yours
-Time Fugitives (Part 1)
-Time Fugitives (Part 2)
-A Rogue's Tale
-Beauty & The Beast
-Mojo Vision
[Disc 2]
-Reunion (Part 1)
-Reunion (Part 2)
-Out of the Past (Part 1)
-Out of the Past (Part 2)
-The Phoenix Saga (Part 1): Sacrifice
-The Phoenix Saga (Part 2): The Dark Shroud
-The Phoenix Saga (Part 3): Cry of the Banshee
-The Phoenix Saga (Part 4): The Starjammers
-The Phoenix Saga (Part 5): Child of Light

"Archive footage" from the world of Watchmen

In case you haven't seen them, there have been a string of viral videos representing newsreels and footage from inside Watchmen continuity. It's just a little something to introduce the Watchmen world to newcomers and whet the whistle of fans eager to see the highly anticipated film.
NBS Nightly News with Ted Philips -March 11th, 1970

The Keene Act & YOU (1977)

"Unaired" Ozymandius Toy Ad (1985)

Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2: Cival War?

Last year when Activision first released information on Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2: Fusion, it seemed like a nice ensemble game of good versus evil, much like the previous incarnation, as seen in this 2008 trailer:

The new trailer unveiled at the this year's NYCC just days ago, however, definitely makes the game look a lot more like hero versus hero in what appears to be a video game version of the blockbuster Marvel mini-series Civil War.

Though, the game is simply being marketed as "Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2" (the "Fusion" has now been dropped), many of the screen shots depict scenes straight out the pages of the Civil War storyline, in which (after a horrible accident in Stamford, just like in the game) the government has decided that superhumans are too dangerous to work outside of government control and have (with the help of Iron Douchebag Tony Stark) passed he Superhuman Registration Act, which makes it illegal for any superhero to live in the U.S. without registering their powers and personal information, but everyone knows that heroes protect their identities to protect their loved ones. Anyone who does not comply is considered a criminal and will be hunted down by the government's pro-registration "heroes" lead by the golden boy himself Iron Man. In a surprising twist, Captain America (now branded a criminal and hated by the majority of the population the he is standing up for) becomes the leader of the those rebelling against this government sanction, believing that it violates every American's civil rights. The trailer shows Captain America being apprehended by Agent Maria Hill and Shield much like in the comic (the outcome of Civil War is what directly lead to the assassination of Captain America). It also appears that the heroes in the game have chosen the same sides as in the comic. Well, if the game is anything even close to the Marvel story, I say bring it on.

FANBOYS

Finally, after multiple delays and more controversy than R. Kelly's home videos, Fanboys graces the theaters this weekend...finally (again). Originally scheduled for release on August 17, 2007, Fanboys had already been screened by George Lucas, who not only gave it two thumbs up, but allowed the filmmakers to use official Star Wars sound FX to enhance the overall feel of the film. Director Kevin Smith was so taken by the screening that he saw that he asked for a cameo in the film, to which the filmmakers gladly obliged. In fact, the film was getting such positive feedback that director Kyle Newman was given extra funding AFTER shooting the film, which he was more than happy to use to shoot additional scenes. The problem with that? He wouldn't be able to get the ensemble back together again until about a month after the movie was scheduled to be released. Now, I'm no expert but I would have to think that may a cause a logistical problem or three. The solution? Postpone the release. Now the film was looking at an early 2008 date. Due to some executive decisions, additional shooting would not take place until around the end of the year and without Newman.

Steven Brill was brought in to "lighten the film". He would remove the main subplot that Linus (played by Chris Marquette) was suffering from terminal cancer and inject the film with more cheap laughs and vulgarities...you know, for entertainment value (must be shooting for an Oscar). Now there existed two versions of the film, so the Weinstein Company decided to screen both version to audiences in Burbank and see which was more well-received. It was decided at this point that the film would now be released around April, 2008. Dedicated fans berated Brill for his uninspired butchering of the film and an online campaign was started to have the film released closer to Newman's original vision. Brill retaliated with barrage of slurs and profanities in response to people's comments, including calling the fans losers and even threatening to hunt one person down.

Newman responded to Brill's action in one interview saying:
"If you're going to go in and re-cut someone's film even though you're not even a fan of the subject matter, just because you want a paycheck, you're not passionate about it, then do that. But don't go opening your mouth and alienating the core audience of that movie. I just thought that was the most low class thing that you could do, especially considering there are so many people that worked years and years and years on this"

Ultimately, the fans' voices were heard and the producers brought Kyle Newman back in to re-edit the film closer to his original vision, including the cancer storyline (which is really the main motivation of the film). Newman and his original team were given a mere 36 hours to come in and re-edit the film. The final version of the film was screened at the 2008 San Diego Comicon, where it was announced that Fanboys would be in theaters on September 19. After the film was pushed back again to November 26, fans eager to see the film began to lose hope that it would ever get released. When the film missed it's November release, it was rumored the Fanboys would now be a DVD release, so when the Weinstein Company announced a release date for February 6 it became a "I'll believe it when I see it" type of situation. Well, I saw it. I believed it. And I LOVED it. I can't wait to see what they do with the DVD considering how much footage they have. It should be...interesting.

FANBOYS 2008 TRAILER


FANBOYS 2009 TRAILER


FANBOYS: BEHIND THE SCENES

TALES OF THE BLACK FREIGHTER DVD

If you've read Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons classic graphic novel Watchmen and you're anticipating the upcoming film adaptation, you've got to be asking yourself, "How exactly are they going to work the secondary material like The Black Freighter into the film?" Well, the answer is...they won't. Instead they will be releasing Watchmen: Tales of the Black Freighter & Under the Hood (which is a story within the story of the Watchmen graphic novel) on DVD to enhance the theatrical release of the film. How much would you pay? -don't answer yet, because as an added bonus the DVD will include the live-action/CGI mockumentary Under the Hood based on the book written by Hollis Mason (the first Nite Owl). NOW how much would you pay? -but wait there's more. This special DVD will also feature: Story Within a story: The Books of Watchmen, a first look at the Green Lantern animated feature, and a digital copy (Blu-ray only). How much would you be willing to pay for this much entertaiment? It doesn't matter because your probably going to pay from $14.99 to $21.99 depending on where you purchase it. The Black Freighter will be in stores on March 24th. (Although, currently Amazon has a 2-disc special edition listed to come out on March 3, the same day as the film. Perplexing...)

UPDATE!!!

More news from the Watchmen home video front -Watchmen: The Complete Motion Comic that many of you have been enjoying on iTunes is also making it's way to DVD/Blu-ray. Of course, you can still watch the episodes on iTunes right now and pay about the same as you would for the discs, but it's really a matter of preference. The Watchmen motion comic was actually very impressive. It really captured the story and the feel of the book. My one criticism would be that these guys couldn't spring to have a girl do the female voice? I mean, COME ON! You don't have a sister or a wife that you could pay with cookies or something? Eitherway, the motion comic hits shelves March 3 as Watchmen makes it to theaters. Now you can get up early, go get the motion comic and then go see the movie and know what to expect (until the new ending)...or you could have read the graphic novel way before then. It's really your choice. It doesn't matter to me. Whatever.